Quip's Day Out (Private)

[CableZ]

“Equestria.

Such a place of adventure, wonderment and friendship. It was a place where anything could happen, you never knew what to expect. Now this usually depended on what type of pony you were, some pony's actively looked for adventure, others simply got roped into it, however there were some ponies that adventure seemed to actively seek out. Usually ponies on an adventure had one adventure, taking them to some locations and generally solving some sort of dilemma. Other adventures simply were about traveling, ponies were a naturally curious and exuberant race, and each had that instinct within them to go out and see...something! Of course every pony was different, such is nature and all that, so there were always different ways to have and enjoy adventures. Now having mentioned adventures so much I suppose you're wondering when this adventure starts, but really, who can say when it ended.

To truly understand where we are going, you need to unlock a door with the key of imagination, beyond it is another dimension. A dimension of sound. A dimension of sight. A dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, things and ideas. You just crossed into the mind of Quip Crack.

When you have a mind such as his, who can tell what is an adventure and what is his daily life, who can say what is real and what might just be a figment of imagination. I'm going to attempt to bring you into the world of such a pony today, hopefully...you will truly see what I mean.”

“Quip...why are you talking to yourself?” came a soft sweet voice from the doorway to Quip's bedroom.

The clown pony jumped slightly, he was looking out of the window while monologing to himself, he turned to face his faithful assistant with a giggle.

“Well every thread needs an introduction Mad Cap”

“...What?” Mad Cap was more than a little confused.

“Never mind. Say, what time is it pray tell?” He asked in a posh put on accent.

“Um...8am” Mad Cap confirmed as she looked at the clock that was on the wall next to Quip, she was used to him asking stuff like that.

“WHAT?! Darn! I spent too long writing that monologue, I was meant to start the day at precisely midnight” He banged his hoof into his other hoof, if he had hands it would be more of a statement.

“What do you mean Quip?”

“A day is 24 hours, how am I meant to start the day if I spend my time sleeping and writing what felt like a very plagiarized introduction” He paced around the room as he explained his thought process (or lack there of) to Mad Cap.

“Introduction to wha- oh you know what ,never mind, anyway, I wanted to tell you that we are out of milk, and its your turn to go to the store.”

“AN UNTRUTH!” Quip then produced the shopping router from behind him, which had previously been in the kitchen, he studied it with a magnifying glass before gasping in shock “huh..not only that but apparently the food that I bought last week was a lot more iffy than I thought according to these dates” He looked up at Mad Cap who looked at him unexpectedly “Oh fine! I'll go, guess today's gonna be one of those days” He sighed as he walked out of his room passed a rather smug Mad Cap.

As he descended the stairs of his strange cart, Quip sighed, he was hoping today would go a bit differently. Still, such is life, even Quip had to slow down once in a while. He opened the front door to his cart (which was actually on the side but, semantics and all that) and walked out into the world. The day was typically picturesque, the pegasi made sure of that. With not a cloud in the sky, Celestia's sun was free to shine down and warm up the day, however there was also a breeze that kept things cool, it was all beautiful to look at. Quip took a chance to take in the scenery for a moment, he'd been in this park for a few months now, Ponyville had seemingly welcomed him as one of their own. His multi coloured cart had become a regular sight in the Ponyville park, ponies often made a point of visiting his shows or just hanging around the cart in the effort of meeting him.

However he was pretty oblivious to this, he just thought ponies in Ponyville were friendlier than most, he hadn't yet realized that ponies were like this nearly everywhere he went. You couldn't find a single fault in the scenery today, it was all very serene. Quip, sadly didn't have time to admire it, he needed to get to the shops before they sold out milk, ponies love milk! The jester reached out behind himself and pulled out his trusty pogo stick! Admiring the red stick of pogo, Quip chuckled, he was one of the only ponies that could use one of these things, made him wonder how select their clientele actually was. He placed the pogo stick upright, somehow balancing it perfectly upright while he stretched his legs out. Taking a deep breath, he then leaped into the stationary standing pogo stick and bounced off down the street. The sound a metallic spring echoed around the town, causing more than a few ponies to look around in confusion, and some would see the jester happily going along on his strange mode of transport as he bounced above the tops of houses.

Quip as making his way down the street, and to his credit he was actually going toward the store, and he wasn't getting distracted. But that wasn't going to last, and sure enough, soon something caught his eye. It was only a fleeting glance, really only a short look in one direction, but that was enough for Quip to see something. At the peak of his pogo-ing, Quip stole a glance of a vast orchard that was on the outskirts of the quaint little town. Quip hadn't really noticed it until now, but it all seemed to be one thing, odd for an orchard to be so big he thought, whoever owned it must be good. With another bouncy hop, Quip grabbed the pogo stick from beneath him and landed gracefully on the roof of a nearby house, holding the pogo stick in one hoof. Quip put one hoof across his forehead to shield his eyes from the bright, warm sunlight as he tried to get a better view. He'd actually heard about the place before, just never really cared to look into it, different times of the year it was Zap apple this, and cider that, quite a popular orchard. Spotting the path that seemed to run alongside the orchard, following it back through the town, Quip mentally mapped out a path to the place of appley goodness. Leaping from the roof top and landed with the sound of a coiled spring rocketing the mad pony away.

A few minutes later, Quip found himself on a dirt trail, heading down the serene path full of nature...well more like up and down the path. Quip occupied himself with various flips, tricks and other skilful displays of time wasting. Quip took to pogo-ing along the fence posts as he drew closer to the path that led up to the barn and farmhouse that he saw every time he peaked, seemed like a nice place, barn looked like it had seen better days, but there seemed to be a stockpile of supplies nearby to rebuild it, Quip's kind of place. Dismounting his pogo-stick as he got to the fork in the road that lead up to the farm, Quip leaned the plaything up against the fence before wrapping it in chains, padlocks and cellophane. Happy that it was secure he headed up the path, looking around at the trees and other pleasant scenery, he wondered who or what he might find in this place.

[ForgottenExistance]

Was there something profound and artistic about bucking apples? Some ponies might be inclined to believing that there was, that kicking trees was some sort of art in itself. Buck it just right, you get a couple of buckets full of apples. Buck it wrong, you get a sore noggin. But that didn't exactly make it an art, it just meant that practice made perfect. And besides, questions like that fell within the purview of philosophy. At least, that's the view that a particular mare had that sunny morning as she went about, kicking the rows of trees in the orchard she tended to. She was a practical pony, and bucking apples was a practical problem. It was something she had plenty of experience in, and it had become repetition of skill, rather then some form of art.

Now, Applejack wasn't the sort of pony to get overly curious about things she shouldn't go sticking her nose into. But when the sound of a metal spring starts echoing down the path to her farm, there was no way in Equestria that she would be able to not get curious. After all, how often was it that something sounding like that actually came that close to her farm? She had heard the distinct sound a few times when she was selling her apples in the market of Ponyville, and had learned to recognize the sound as that of a pogo stick that a particular clown used as transportation. She had always thought of it as a strange manner of transportation for a pony, and had often watched with curiosity as he hopped about the market square. But she had never heard it come that close to her farm.

Stepping back from the tree she had only just bucked, she raised her hoof to wipe the sweat off of her brow before turning towards the dirt path that lead out of her orchard. What in Equestria would that clown be doing coming up to her farm? He seemed friendly enough, but he had never paid a visit to the Apple family before. The farm pony thought it was very odd that he would only now come up to see them. But, nopony could ever say that the Apple family wasn't a friendly lot, and she wouldn't let a visitor go without being welcomed to the orchard. Even if that visitor was a strange pony who hopped around like a rabbit with that pogo stick of his.

Glancing back at the buckets of apples, she turned back towards the road and started trotting off. The buckets could stay there for the time being, at least until she made sure that everything was alright with the pony that was coming up the road. If she took too long, she was sure that Big Mac could grab the buckets on his way through back to the farm, but she doubted she'd be that long. Applejack vaguely recalled his name being something along the likeness of Quip, but what sort of pony had a name like Quip? The farm pony would just have to wait and see if she had the right name in mind, or if she had completely gone off-base.

Hopping over the fence and landing on the dusty road, she put on a grin as she turned towards the strange pony and gave a friendly wave to him, "Howdy there, pardner'! What brings you 'round these parts?" the farm pony exclaimed enthusiastically to the newcomer, the unmistakable twang of the country rang in her voice. Even at a distance though, she had to wonder why exactly he was there. He didn't look injured, or really to be looking for anything specific. He didn't have a determined step, and he wasn't searching around for something. To her, it looked like he was just sort of...wandering. Not aimlessly, but just wandering. Strange, she had to admit, but she wasn't going to jump to any sort of conclusions. That never got anypony anywhere.

[CableZ]

Quip payed no attention to current events or famous types that weren't in his field of work, he once managed to walk right past Vinyl Scratch without so much as looking at her, he did the same with one of the wonderbolts once as well. As such Quip had no idea who this farm pony was, she was cute though, hat and everything. Looking around for a moment Quip wondered if there was someone else around that might have spurred her to come on over, but nope, seemed she was just a nice host. Quip laughed slightly before turning away from her, looking like he was doing something out of her view, hiding something from her. With a little hop, he turned back to face the orange pony with his metallic grin. Atop his head, Quip now wore a white cowboy hat, stylish and practical...if you were a cowboy.

"Well little lady, I saw yer' amazing red apples in the trees here, an' they looked so mighty delicious that I just had to take a look see" Quip spoke with a put on accent, although it wasn't as over the top as you might expect.

With a little giggle, Quip began walking up toward the farm house, hoping the new pony would follow him. He looked around the area with genuine interest, the place was pretty, and it beckoned exploration. It was quite a warm day out, so the work must have been hard for this farm pony, Quip thought.

"Hm...you seem to have apples on every single tree...yet I see you've been kicking a lot.." Quip looked back at AJ, seeing the slight sweat drops on her forehead, a combination of heat and work more than likely, or her hat. "Animators...so lazy" Quip shook his head before heading over toward the barn, talking as he walked.

"Oh, I'm Quip by the way, nice to meet you" Quip didn't seem to mind that he was kind of intruding on her farm, he just seemed to happy and casual about it all. "So..tell me..whats your name?" The jester was sweet, and seemed interested in her, not everyday you met such a farm pony after all, then again it wasn't every day you met a masked clown so he had no idea how she felt.

[ForgottenExistance]

Applejack blinked a few times, recoiling a little in surprise. She could have been certain that he was mocking her, if he were a regular pony of course. But he was just so strange that she really couldn't make that assumption. A pony who jumped around on a contraption like a pogo stick really couldn't be taken seriously in a situation like that. Still, the sudden appearance of a hat and the exaggerated accent threw her off a little. She was caught off guard when he spoke next, even if his voice was back to its normal lack-of-noticeable-accent state.

Quickly trotting after him to avoid being left behind, and ensuring she could keep an eye on him, she settled into a light pace next to him towards the farm. She watched him curiously, not entirely sure what to make of him quite yet. He seemed genuinely interested in the scenery and the farm, but what was with his random outburst about animators? Well, she'd have to keep an eye on him. But for the time being, she had no problem with showing him around the farm and making him feel welcome. Even if he happened to be wearing an extremely creepy clown mask.

Following him along towards wherever it was that he was heading, she nodded, "Pleasure to make y'er acquaintance, Mister Quip. Name's Applejack," she said with a pleasant smile. Normally, this would be the point where she shook his hoof. But, those were under normal circumstances when she was standing still, face-to-face with her guest. In this situation, she really couldn't do that without falling onto her face. After all, it was incredibly difficult to walk with three legs while trying to shake hooves with another pony. So, it was best to just keep up with him and make sure he didn't do anything to her barn. They had only just recently rebuilt it, after all!

Not sure if she should really wait any longer, Applejack turned her head to look over at him. Keeping up her pleasant smile, she spoke, "Though, if yah don't mind my asking, what are yah lookin' to do up here? I know yah said yah came up here ta'see our apples, but that don't quite tell me what it is y'er here to do. Are'ya just here for a tour?" she asked, a brow raised quizzically as she appraised the clown. It occurred to her that he would be a living nightmare for anypony who was scared of clowns. Especially with that mask on. But, luckily she happened to not be afraid of clowns, so there was little need to be concerned about that. But, she did have a hard time taking him seriously with the mask on. Really though, how could you take somepony in a clown mask seriously?

[CableZ]

Quip came to a stop in front of the farmhouse and turned to smile at the farm pony, of course she couldn't see his smile. Looking around, Quip decided to hold up and talk to this pony for a bit, she was pretty fun, friendly to be sure.

"Pleasure to meet you Applejack" He smiled in vain "As for why I'm here...curiosity I suppose, it really is a beautiful farm" he sounded sincere and cheery, quite pleasant.

Quip looked around but was confident that there wasn't really much else to see on the farm, so talking to this mare was the best thing around, and there was nothing wrong with that. Quip spotted a tree that offered some shade from the sun on a little grassy patch just off from the dirt road. It wasn't an apple tree, as much as it was a large oak, must be for decoration more than apple functionality. With a little nod he signaled over to the tree and walked over to the pleasantly shady grass, looked around at the little area, he quickly took his hat from atop his head and reached into the head piece, his arm going in fully as if there were no bottom to the thing. Quickly pulling out a rolled up blanket, Quip rolled the checkered material across the grass, revealing two plates of gourmet food, and a candle along with a rose, the light around the area seemed to dim, offering a pleasant mood.

"Ooops, thats the romantic picnic, let me try again" Quip sheepishly chuckled before placing his hoof back on the picnic blanket, and as if time had been reversed, it rolled up, the lightning going back to normal quickly as the blanket rolled up into his hoof in an impossible manner. Stuffing the blanket back into his hat, he rummaged around once more in the thing, before finding the thing he was looking for, a blanket..but this one is a different colour, totally different. Running through the motions again, Quip rolled out the blanket, this time a less romantic affair popped out, a pitcher of tasty sweet lemonade, a enticing and perfect treat for someone who had just been hard at work. Quip plopped down on the picnic blanket happily.

"Ahhhh, relaxing" he smiled, placing his hat down by his side, the sound of many heavy object moving around came from it, like a shipping container.

[ForgottenExistance]

Applejack nodded slightly at his comment on how beautiful the farm was, she had to admit, she took quite a lot of pride in the work that she had put into the farm. It might not be beautiful like some fancy painting, but it was beautiful in its own way, and Applejack couldn't have been happier with it. She cantered along beside him, expecting him to say something else about the land. But, with the mask on, it was really impossible to tell if he was planning on saying anything else or not. Right before they came to a halt next to the tree, she assumed that he had nothing else to say, and quickly spoke, "Why thank yah, I suppose. We take good care of the farm," she said with a little nod, coming to a halt to watch the masked pony fish around in his hat.

The farm pony could only stand there with her jaw left slightly slack as the masked pony pulled not only one entire picnic setup from his hat, but two. How in Equestria could somepony possibly stuff two picnics in his hat? Her hat didn't have anything in it except... well, nothing. Shaking her head slightly after he finished setting up the second picnic, she eyed the lemonade curiously. The beverage sounded excellent to her at the moment, and he seemed relatively harmless to her. Even if he was a bit on the odd side.

Hesitantly stepping onto the blanket, she sat down facing him and looked around at the setup for another few moments. After settling in, she gestured to the lemonade with a hoof and looked at him, "May I?" she asked, not wanting to assume that it was just alright for her to go ahead and take the beverage. Being polite was never something to be underestimated, even if it was a strange masked clown pony that she was being polite to. She didn't think that she'd really ever get over that particular mask though.

[CableZ]

Quip made a little gesture that said 'by all means' in response to her asking about the lemonade, frankly he'd forgotten it was in there, he was relatively sure he packed this picnic when he was on a diet but who can remember how many picnics they store in their hat at any one time? Anyway, Quip found the farm quite peaceful..too peaceful. Quip had a very strange phobia, he was terrified of post card scenes. The staged images of something pleasant or nice with some ponies sat happily looking wishfully off somewhere, he found them fake yet real and it scared him. He had to test something. Hopping up softly from his seat position, Quip trotted away without a word, walking down the path that he had just come up, the path that lead to the farm house.

When he got around 20 meters away, Quip turned and looked at the scene in front of him. With the leaves on the trees softly flowing in the brisk wind, the sun highlight everything and detailing the rest with soft shadows, the bright farmhouse look beautiful, and of finally, sat under a tree with a glass of lemonade on a picnic blanket, a cute orange pony looking happy. Quip wasn't sure of the true severity of the scene, so he opted for a test. Quickly pulling out a camera and tripod and quickly planted it down in the dry earth, adjusting the legs quickly to make sure it was level. Quickly snapping a picture, the camera made a slight whirring sound before printing out a Polaroid. Quickly packing the camera back into its unknown origin spot. Quip then walked back over to where Applejack was sitting, shaking the Polaroid as he did so.

"Sorry about that, just checking something" Quip said nonchalantly

As the colour of the picture slowly faded in, Quip's pupils constricted at the site of the image. Perfect framing, perfect composition, perfect lighting, perfect scene...perfect...post card. With a shrieking wail Quip threw the picture away in a dramatic fashion, of course since it was a picture it simply, caught in the air and floated away. Quip however was past the point of rationality..and now he was really crazy. Grabbing Applejack, he began running away with her. Dragging her to the path that ran along the side of the orchard, the one that headed toward the town. Blowing into his hoof (which created a high pitched shrill whistle) Quip waved down something, and almost immediately and at a stupid speed, a yellow stage carriage rolled up with black checkers on it, being pulled by a team of gruff looking ponies wearing worker caps who nodded in greeting to the pony. Quickly bundling Applejack into the taxi cab, Quip hopped in himself and stuck his head out of the window, suddenly wearing a fedora.

"Nyeeh, take us to manehatten, I'll double your money if you do it spritely see?" Quip spoke in a old timey new yorker gangster accent, slimy and slightly high pitched. Quip then sat back in his seat, a tooth pick appearing where his mouth would be.