Post by Rapid Quill on Aug 3, 2017 23:29:41 GMT
ooc: I hope it is okay for me to put this here. In truth I wasn't sure which ooc board would be the most appropriate place to post this rather intense conversation between my character, Rapid Quill and my devious, manipulative npc, Mental Block. I was hoping there was a thread for like character journals, but alas I did not see any. At any rate I hope people enjoy this little read. It takes place shortly after Rapid escapes the Crystal Empire with Thunder Strike's help. Rapid returns with the shocking desire to quit his job as a reporter, so he first confronts his editor in chief of this who then after a little 'persuading' on Rapid's part points him to the one in charge of the ever elusive and secretive spy organization known as FOWL.
bic: Mental Block: Oh Mr. Quill please come in. Come in. I don't bite and please kindly shut the door behind you. I do so hate drafts.
Rapid: So you're the one behind everything and the one pulling Mind Blower's strings?
Mental Block: /smiles venomously/ Why yes I am. But I'm not only pulling his strings, but then I gather that is why you are here, to discuss your...grievances against my little organization. Tell me Rapid, what are you unhappy with?
Rapid: That's right and not only that but I am here to tell you the same exact thing I just got through telling Mind Blower. That I quit and I want out of this insane organization of yours! What you guys do here, it just isn't right!
Mental Block: /just stifles a yawn/
Rapid: /narrows his eyes at her/ I'm sorry, but am I boring you?
Mental Block: Yes you are and frankly, you and I both already know the truth.
Rapid: /glares/ And what truth is that?
Mental Block: /grin widens as she begins to circle Rapid/ Think about it. If I am pulling your editor in chief's strings than I am also pulling yours. You both are my puppets and I am your puppet master!
Rapid: /glares/ Well not anymore! As soon as I leave here today I am not ever coming back!
Mental Block: Oh? Are you so certain of that? Will you kindly just sit down and listen to me?
Rapid: /does so only to be strapped tightly to his chair/ Hey, what's going on? I don't want to obey you!
Mental Block: Oh but you can't help it! You're just plain addicted to obeying me and my orders!
Rapid: /squirms and glares/ What'd you do to me?
M.B: /grins venomously/ Oh wouldn't you like to know! Now then would you kindly just sit there quietly in your chair whilst I try to explain a few things to you! You are nothing but my minion and as such you will do as you are told! You are but my puppet and I am your puppet master! Your precious little mind is all mine to play with! It is like putty in my hooves! With just one simple phrase I can get you to do whatever I please! You have no choice, but to obey! So why struggle? Why fight it and only prolong the inevitable?
Rapid: /is still struggling against his restraints/ Noooo! you can't do this to me! To anyone! It isn't right! Now let me go!
M.B: Ha, the funny thing about that is you actually agree with my beliefs and what I stand for! That is why it is so easy for me to control you. I mean think about it Rapid, if you and I had such differing beliefs as you now claim than it wouldn't be so easy for me to...persuade you to work for me!
Rapid: What do you mean?
M.B: Tell me Rapid are you familiar with the concept of the ends justifies the means?
Rapid: I am. What about it?
M.B: Oh good then this should just be a little refresher course for you. What do you think of it? Do you agree with it at all?
Rapid: I agree with most of it, yes. Following such a...controversial concept has achieved some good things.
M.B: Good. I am so glad you...
Rapid: But it's also harmful and that's part of the reason why it is so controversial. Nopony in their right minds would ever completely agree with it.
M.B: Then call me the crazy minority then! But it is completely normal to not agree with the entirety of our humble motto just yet. After all where would the fun in that be? And I do so adore a challenge!
Rapid: Wait, so the ends justifies the means is your organization's motto?
M.B: Why yes. Yes of course it is! And why wouldn't it be? We're the good guys after all! Despite our...questionable name, FOWL's cause has always been a noble one with good intentions.
Rapid: Pardon me, but I find that a little hard to believe. If you are really as good as you claim then you and your precious allies wouldn't be so secretive and you wouldn't hide in the shadows so much. You would be much more open with your intent. And surely somepony would have mentioned something of your exploits by now; somepony say Celestia or Luna.
M.B: All very good questions Rapid. You most definitely have reporter's instincts. I like that in a minion. But allow me to answer your many inquiries with an inquiry of my own.
Rapid: Go ahead, but just so you know I'm not your minion and I'm most certainly not the paper's minion! I'm my own pony!
M.B: /sighs/ Entertain such delusions if you really must Mr. Quill. I don't care. I'm just here to educate you on matters. So tell me, do you know what's kept all of Equestria going for all of these years? Why it hasn't fallen or been destroyed? Or better yet been taken over by a powerful yet terrible villain?
Rapid: A history lesson? You're giving me a simple history lesson? Don't be so insulting! Everypony knows that it is all thanks to the combined efforts of the two sisters that we are all safe except for the one moment in time when Princess Luna allowed her own jealousy and hatred to consume her transforming her into the monster, Nightmare Moon. but thanks to the combined elements of harmony wielded by none other than the Princess Twilight and her friends the monstrous Nightmare Moon was defeated and reverted back to her old Princess of the Moon self. And now everything is back to normal with the princesses keeping Equestria safe from harm. Really Mrs. er Block you don't need to remind me of that.
M.B: /just starts laughing like a nut/ Oh Rapid, Rapid, Rapid do you really think that the princesses are the sole reason Equestria remains a safe and tranquil place to live free of wars? Because if you did you really are far more naive than I originally thought!
Rapid: Oh I did until you laughed like that and now I think I'm just going to go over here now not that you are crazy or anything! I most definitely don't think you are a loon or anything like that, so don't think that! I just think that maybe I better just go...
M.B: Sorry, but I'm not through with you yet. I'm afraid I cannot let you leave this room until you have heard everything I have to say to you. So until you are ready to hear more I'm afraid I will need to put you in a holding cell.
Rapid: /sneers/ A holding cell? So much for you being one of the good guys! Good guys don't keep other ponies prisoner for no reason!
M.B: But we are the good guys! Holding you would be for a good cause! Just think of all the good it will do for so many ponies if I succeed in convincing you of all the good FOWL does and has done in the past! And what about Captain Saber? He held you and punished you real good from what I understand!
Rapid: Well that was different and it was certainly for a good reason! I was only made his prisoner because he caught me red-hoofed spying on the Crystal Empire's military! What I did was wrong. I deserved to be punished and what's worse, I escaped... Of course escaping wasn't exactly my idea! I just wanted to serve my time in the Empire and get it over with! But that darn interfering, show off of a pegasus kind of changed things!
M.B: Yes, well saving you was necessary to prove our point and some would even consider the punishment you suffered there cruel and unusual.
Rapid: Yes, well the lashes did hurt like hell. I really hope they don't recapture me and force even more painful lashes upon me!
M.B: Hm, yes my point exactly! It was cruel and unnecessary to punish you in such a way! And I blame it all on Equestria's fickle and inconsistent justice system! I mean your punishment was certainly far more severe than many dangerous villains such as Discord and Starlight Glimmer for example! What they did was far worse than what you did! Really what punishments did they even receive for their villainous activities? A simple slap on the wrist? Becoming Princess Twilight's star pupil? How in Equestria is that even fair?
Rapid: Wait, Starlight was a villain? I mean I knew Discord was, but Starlight? She's Princess Twilight's pupil, so how could she...?
M.B: Oh Rapid, it's adorable how naive you truly are! But yes, Starlight once upon a time not so very long ago was indeed a villain! Us FOWL agents know what she did and are still trying to clean up the damage she caused. She left quite a mess! We are hoping that once you join us that you will help us clean up the mess.
Rapid: Uh what exactly did she do?
M.B: Basically she forced everypony to be equal by forcibly removing their cutie marks and replacing them with equal signs. Oh and she transformed all those who lived in her little town into a brainwashed cult.
Rapid: She what!? That's crazy!
M.B: Yeah, lucky for us the Princess of Friendship and her friends fixed everything with our help of course! Nopony knows we helped and we aim to keep it that way. We're...humble like that. We don't need nor want the attention that comes with being heroes unlike some ponies!
Rapid: /understandably is staring to get mad, but not at Mental Block/ Starlight did all that without so much of a punishment? You...you're right, that isn't fair! Also I am fully aware that Discord didn't receive any punishment as well aside from being scolded even after he betrayed us to Tirek!
M.B: /sighs/ Ah, yes Tirek! Please don't remind me of him! The damage he and Discord left behind after his defeat was even greater than Starlight's! We FOWL agents are still trying to access all the damage! See, this is one of the many reasons FOWL needs good agents like you, to help us combat all of these problems that the princesses are understandably far too busy to face themselves! And that was what I was trying to explain before you so subtlety accused me of being mentally unwell. Are you ready now for me to continue or do I need to hold you in a cell until you are?
Rapid: I'll listen and sorry. You're not as crazy as I thought.
M.B: I knew you'd see reason Mr. Quill! You see, it is as I have been saying, we FOWL agents are one of the main reasons why Equestria remains in one piece and why its government remains in tact. It is all largely thanks to our efforts! Whenever trouble arises those who know of us contacts us to provide assistance!
Rapid: But if so few know of your existence, how does anybody hire you?
M.B: It's really quite simple Mr. Quill. You see, those who do know of us are not just your average, run of the mill pony. Do you honestly think we will tell just anypony on the streets about us? Of course not! Our contacts for the most part are in high political positions of government or are important scientists. They contact us through use of secret scrolls. Their scrolls go directly to them and directly to us. No random pony can read them. And our contacts are smart enough to keep quiet about us and what we are trying to accompish!
Rapid: How very clever of you.
M.B: Why, thank you. I am so glad you agree with our...methods! But I'm curious, does this mean you are ready to rejoin us or do you still wish to quit? In truth, I was actually thinking of promoting you for a job well done!
Rapid: /sighs/ I don't know. There is so much I need to think about first and...wait what? Why would you guys want to promote me when I failed so badly? I got caught and in doing so risked exposure of your secret organization!
M.B: Please don't give yourself so much credit and you exaggerate! You succeeded in getting the story of the century! You just had no idea it was going to be about you! Just look around you, we never before sold so many newspapers and it is truly all thanks to you and your public punishment!
Rapid: /rolls his eyes and scoffs/ Gee, thanks! Glad I could assist you in selling so many newspapers! Look, do you really think selling a story that advertises my escape wise? What about all that about wanting to remain hidden and remaining behind the scenes?
M.B: Oh you see that's the beauty of it! Most ponies won't catch on! You see, Thunder Strike, the pegasus we sent to rescue you is largely a nobody! Nopony is gonna link her back to us! Most will just think she acted out on her own! And besides, there's a reason we sent you out on your mission without your memories. We rather figured that it was only a matter of time before you slipped up and get yourself captured and in the event you got captured we didn't want you to go blabbing to your captors about us and our secret society! You have never been caught before and success was starting to get your head causing you to act out so arrogantly! We just knew that your arrogance would cause you to slip up and get caught! So we did the most reasonable thing we could do, we sent you without your memories of us. And it's a good thing we did too! Otherwise they would have learned so much more than what you did manage to tell them. As for the details within the paper itself, we sort of purposely left some rather incriminating points off and we bribed rival papers to do the same. You will not believe the things some ponies will do for extra bits these days! Now all that remains is to persuade Captain Saber to leave you alone.
Rapid: Well it seems you have most of your bases covered. I must say I'm impressed! But I highly doubt that Saber will just forget about me.
M.B: /smiles and pets Rapid on the head/ Don't you worry your adorable little head about it! Allow your generous leader to take care of that overzealous crab of a captain! As for your joining me. I'm going to present to you a very real situation and you tell me what you would do in it. Okay?
Rapid: Uh sure... I'm listening.
M.B: Wonderful. Now listen closely. Hypothetical. You and a few others are aborad a raft in the middle of the ocean. You are survivors of a terrible storm and for some unexplained reason your magic and the magic of your fellow unicorns are not working and furthermore the pegasi that accompanied you cannot fly! Sadly, there are other ponies struggling in the water. Your raft comfortably holds twenty and there are already twenty ponies in it, but it can hold another ten. It will just be crowded and you won't have as much food. What do you do? Do you A. allow ten more ponies into your raft? B. allow every pony you see onto the raft dooming your chances of survival? But hey at least you were nice! Or do you C. shoo away the struggling ponies increasing your chances of survival?
Rapid: /sighs/ You and I both know that the most logical choice is C.
M.B: Yes, but many ponies would call choosing C as evil.
Rapid: Why?
M.B: /yawns/ I don't know something about morals and ethics. I don't normally pay too much attention as their line of thinking is largely incorrect and illogical...
Rapid: /head starts to hurt and he begins to feel tired/
M.B: But enough of that! You look exhausted! I think I shall let you get some much needed rest. You need not worry about getting captured! We are all friends here!
Rapid: /head feels clouded/ I...okay.
M.B: /orders a couple of guards to take Rapid into a secret room to get some sleep/
bic: Mental Block: Oh Mr. Quill please come in. Come in. I don't bite and please kindly shut the door behind you. I do so hate drafts.
Rapid: So you're the one behind everything and the one pulling Mind Blower's strings?
Mental Block: /smiles venomously/ Why yes I am. But I'm not only pulling his strings, but then I gather that is why you are here, to discuss your...grievances against my little organization. Tell me Rapid, what are you unhappy with?
Rapid: That's right and not only that but I am here to tell you the same exact thing I just got through telling Mind Blower. That I quit and I want out of this insane organization of yours! What you guys do here, it just isn't right!
Mental Block: /just stifles a yawn/
Rapid: /narrows his eyes at her/ I'm sorry, but am I boring you?
Mental Block: Yes you are and frankly, you and I both already know the truth.
Rapid: /glares/ And what truth is that?
Mental Block: /grin widens as she begins to circle Rapid/ Think about it. If I am pulling your editor in chief's strings than I am also pulling yours. You both are my puppets and I am your puppet master!
Rapid: /glares/ Well not anymore! As soon as I leave here today I am not ever coming back!
Mental Block: Oh? Are you so certain of that? Will you kindly just sit down and listen to me?
Rapid: /does so only to be strapped tightly to his chair/ Hey, what's going on? I don't want to obey you!
Mental Block: Oh but you can't help it! You're just plain addicted to obeying me and my orders!
Rapid: /squirms and glares/ What'd you do to me?
M.B: /grins venomously/ Oh wouldn't you like to know! Now then would you kindly just sit there quietly in your chair whilst I try to explain a few things to you! You are nothing but my minion and as such you will do as you are told! You are but my puppet and I am your puppet master! Your precious little mind is all mine to play with! It is like putty in my hooves! With just one simple phrase I can get you to do whatever I please! You have no choice, but to obey! So why struggle? Why fight it and only prolong the inevitable?
Rapid: /is still struggling against his restraints/ Noooo! you can't do this to me! To anyone! It isn't right! Now let me go!
M.B: Ha, the funny thing about that is you actually agree with my beliefs and what I stand for! That is why it is so easy for me to control you. I mean think about it Rapid, if you and I had such differing beliefs as you now claim than it wouldn't be so easy for me to...persuade you to work for me!
Rapid: What do you mean?
M.B: Tell me Rapid are you familiar with the concept of the ends justifies the means?
Rapid: I am. What about it?
M.B: Oh good then this should just be a little refresher course for you. What do you think of it? Do you agree with it at all?
Rapid: I agree with most of it, yes. Following such a...controversial concept has achieved some good things.
M.B: Good. I am so glad you...
Rapid: But it's also harmful and that's part of the reason why it is so controversial. Nopony in their right minds would ever completely agree with it.
M.B: Then call me the crazy minority then! But it is completely normal to not agree with the entirety of our humble motto just yet. After all where would the fun in that be? And I do so adore a challenge!
Rapid: Wait, so the ends justifies the means is your organization's motto?
M.B: Why yes. Yes of course it is! And why wouldn't it be? We're the good guys after all! Despite our...questionable name, FOWL's cause has always been a noble one with good intentions.
Rapid: Pardon me, but I find that a little hard to believe. If you are really as good as you claim then you and your precious allies wouldn't be so secretive and you wouldn't hide in the shadows so much. You would be much more open with your intent. And surely somepony would have mentioned something of your exploits by now; somepony say Celestia or Luna.
M.B: All very good questions Rapid. You most definitely have reporter's instincts. I like that in a minion. But allow me to answer your many inquiries with an inquiry of my own.
Rapid: Go ahead, but just so you know I'm not your minion and I'm most certainly not the paper's minion! I'm my own pony!
M.B: /sighs/ Entertain such delusions if you really must Mr. Quill. I don't care. I'm just here to educate you on matters. So tell me, do you know what's kept all of Equestria going for all of these years? Why it hasn't fallen or been destroyed? Or better yet been taken over by a powerful yet terrible villain?
Rapid: A history lesson? You're giving me a simple history lesson? Don't be so insulting! Everypony knows that it is all thanks to the combined efforts of the two sisters that we are all safe except for the one moment in time when Princess Luna allowed her own jealousy and hatred to consume her transforming her into the monster, Nightmare Moon. but thanks to the combined elements of harmony wielded by none other than the Princess Twilight and her friends the monstrous Nightmare Moon was defeated and reverted back to her old Princess of the Moon self. And now everything is back to normal with the princesses keeping Equestria safe from harm. Really Mrs. er Block you don't need to remind me of that.
M.B: /just starts laughing like a nut/ Oh Rapid, Rapid, Rapid do you really think that the princesses are the sole reason Equestria remains a safe and tranquil place to live free of wars? Because if you did you really are far more naive than I originally thought!
Rapid: Oh I did until you laughed like that and now I think I'm just going to go over here now not that you are crazy or anything! I most definitely don't think you are a loon or anything like that, so don't think that! I just think that maybe I better just go...
M.B: Sorry, but I'm not through with you yet. I'm afraid I cannot let you leave this room until you have heard everything I have to say to you. So until you are ready to hear more I'm afraid I will need to put you in a holding cell.
Rapid: /sneers/ A holding cell? So much for you being one of the good guys! Good guys don't keep other ponies prisoner for no reason!
M.B: But we are the good guys! Holding you would be for a good cause! Just think of all the good it will do for so many ponies if I succeed in convincing you of all the good FOWL does and has done in the past! And what about Captain Saber? He held you and punished you real good from what I understand!
Rapid: Well that was different and it was certainly for a good reason! I was only made his prisoner because he caught me red-hoofed spying on the Crystal Empire's military! What I did was wrong. I deserved to be punished and what's worse, I escaped... Of course escaping wasn't exactly my idea! I just wanted to serve my time in the Empire and get it over with! But that darn interfering, show off of a pegasus kind of changed things!
M.B: Yes, well saving you was necessary to prove our point and some would even consider the punishment you suffered there cruel and unusual.
Rapid: Yes, well the lashes did hurt like hell. I really hope they don't recapture me and force even more painful lashes upon me!
M.B: Hm, yes my point exactly! It was cruel and unnecessary to punish you in such a way! And I blame it all on Equestria's fickle and inconsistent justice system! I mean your punishment was certainly far more severe than many dangerous villains such as Discord and Starlight Glimmer for example! What they did was far worse than what you did! Really what punishments did they even receive for their villainous activities? A simple slap on the wrist? Becoming Princess Twilight's star pupil? How in Equestria is that even fair?
Rapid: Wait, Starlight was a villain? I mean I knew Discord was, but Starlight? She's Princess Twilight's pupil, so how could she...?
M.B: Oh Rapid, it's adorable how naive you truly are! But yes, Starlight once upon a time not so very long ago was indeed a villain! Us FOWL agents know what she did and are still trying to clean up the damage she caused. She left quite a mess! We are hoping that once you join us that you will help us clean up the mess.
Rapid: Uh what exactly did she do?
M.B: Basically she forced everypony to be equal by forcibly removing their cutie marks and replacing them with equal signs. Oh and she transformed all those who lived in her little town into a brainwashed cult.
Rapid: She what!? That's crazy!
M.B: Yeah, lucky for us the Princess of Friendship and her friends fixed everything with our help of course! Nopony knows we helped and we aim to keep it that way. We're...humble like that. We don't need nor want the attention that comes with being heroes unlike some ponies!
Rapid: /understandably is staring to get mad, but not at Mental Block/ Starlight did all that without so much of a punishment? You...you're right, that isn't fair! Also I am fully aware that Discord didn't receive any punishment as well aside from being scolded even after he betrayed us to Tirek!
M.B: /sighs/ Ah, yes Tirek! Please don't remind me of him! The damage he and Discord left behind after his defeat was even greater than Starlight's! We FOWL agents are still trying to access all the damage! See, this is one of the many reasons FOWL needs good agents like you, to help us combat all of these problems that the princesses are understandably far too busy to face themselves! And that was what I was trying to explain before you so subtlety accused me of being mentally unwell. Are you ready now for me to continue or do I need to hold you in a cell until you are?
Rapid: I'll listen and sorry. You're not as crazy as I thought.
M.B: I knew you'd see reason Mr. Quill! You see, it is as I have been saying, we FOWL agents are one of the main reasons why Equestria remains in one piece and why its government remains in tact. It is all largely thanks to our efforts! Whenever trouble arises those who know of us contacts us to provide assistance!
Rapid: But if so few know of your existence, how does anybody hire you?
M.B: It's really quite simple Mr. Quill. You see, those who do know of us are not just your average, run of the mill pony. Do you honestly think we will tell just anypony on the streets about us? Of course not! Our contacts for the most part are in high political positions of government or are important scientists. They contact us through use of secret scrolls. Their scrolls go directly to them and directly to us. No random pony can read them. And our contacts are smart enough to keep quiet about us and what we are trying to accompish!
Rapid: How very clever of you.
M.B: Why, thank you. I am so glad you agree with our...methods! But I'm curious, does this mean you are ready to rejoin us or do you still wish to quit? In truth, I was actually thinking of promoting you for a job well done!
Rapid: /sighs/ I don't know. There is so much I need to think about first and...wait what? Why would you guys want to promote me when I failed so badly? I got caught and in doing so risked exposure of your secret organization!
M.B: Please don't give yourself so much credit and you exaggerate! You succeeded in getting the story of the century! You just had no idea it was going to be about you! Just look around you, we never before sold so many newspapers and it is truly all thanks to you and your public punishment!
Rapid: /rolls his eyes and scoffs/ Gee, thanks! Glad I could assist you in selling so many newspapers! Look, do you really think selling a story that advertises my escape wise? What about all that about wanting to remain hidden and remaining behind the scenes?
M.B: Oh you see that's the beauty of it! Most ponies won't catch on! You see, Thunder Strike, the pegasus we sent to rescue you is largely a nobody! Nopony is gonna link her back to us! Most will just think she acted out on her own! And besides, there's a reason we sent you out on your mission without your memories. We rather figured that it was only a matter of time before you slipped up and get yourself captured and in the event you got captured we didn't want you to go blabbing to your captors about us and our secret society! You have never been caught before and success was starting to get your head causing you to act out so arrogantly! We just knew that your arrogance would cause you to slip up and get caught! So we did the most reasonable thing we could do, we sent you without your memories of us. And it's a good thing we did too! Otherwise they would have learned so much more than what you did manage to tell them. As for the details within the paper itself, we sort of purposely left some rather incriminating points off and we bribed rival papers to do the same. You will not believe the things some ponies will do for extra bits these days! Now all that remains is to persuade Captain Saber to leave you alone.
Rapid: Well it seems you have most of your bases covered. I must say I'm impressed! But I highly doubt that Saber will just forget about me.
M.B: /smiles and pets Rapid on the head/ Don't you worry your adorable little head about it! Allow your generous leader to take care of that overzealous crab of a captain! As for your joining me. I'm going to present to you a very real situation and you tell me what you would do in it. Okay?
Rapid: Uh sure... I'm listening.
M.B: Wonderful. Now listen closely. Hypothetical. You and a few others are aborad a raft in the middle of the ocean. You are survivors of a terrible storm and for some unexplained reason your magic and the magic of your fellow unicorns are not working and furthermore the pegasi that accompanied you cannot fly! Sadly, there are other ponies struggling in the water. Your raft comfortably holds twenty and there are already twenty ponies in it, but it can hold another ten. It will just be crowded and you won't have as much food. What do you do? Do you A. allow ten more ponies into your raft? B. allow every pony you see onto the raft dooming your chances of survival? But hey at least you were nice! Or do you C. shoo away the struggling ponies increasing your chances of survival?
Rapid: /sighs/ You and I both know that the most logical choice is C.
M.B: Yes, but many ponies would call choosing C as evil.
Rapid: Why?
M.B: /yawns/ I don't know something about morals and ethics. I don't normally pay too much attention as their line of thinking is largely incorrect and illogical...
Rapid: /head starts to hurt and he begins to feel tired/
M.B: But enough of that! You look exhausted! I think I shall let you get some much needed rest. You need not worry about getting captured! We are all friends here!
Rapid: /head feels clouded/ I...okay.
M.B: /orders a couple of guards to take Rapid into a secret room to get some sleep/
i was kinda excited to feel like im back in 2015